At the August 11 Trenton Thunder/Akron Aeros game, played at Waterfront Park in Trenton (at a temperature just below that which would cause the ad covered outfield fence to burst into flames) I was dazzled by a new baseball marketing gimmick.
The bat retrieving dog, Chase.
After each Thunder batter had been recorded out, Chase charged onto the field and picked up the bat in his jaws, dutifully returning it to the dugout.
While assuming that no member of PETA has become aware of this – don’t laugh, I’m sure there is some animal lover willing to be hit with a bat thousands of times before allowing Chase to fetch another one – I think the Thunder may be on to something… something that might have an application at athletic venues across the nation, and The ’Burbs.

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Plenty of free parking.
A strip mall setting.
No cover.
You’re drinking in The ‘Burbs, my friend.
A two-night, four bar, Bucks and Montgomery County junket last Friday and Saturday nights was nearly a complete sausage party tour…
Fatty, generic, store brand, breakfast-style sausage at that.
Save for a few lithe lasses Saturday at The Black Bull in Holland, widespread evidence of suburban pulchritude was sparse.
Desperation, however, seemed widespread.
Meatheads in too-tight t-shirts. Badly done comb-overs. Bright white sneakers.
Nice.
The most notable instance occurred late Friday evening and early Saturday morning at The Freight House in Doylestown, a city which apparently has some citizens who are upset at the amount of teenage loitering that can often be seen at night in the Bucks County seat.

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