For some reason when people first meet me they make this weird assumption that I'm really into movies. I don't know if it's because of the way I dress or the fact that I write movie reviews but I just don't care for films or film-making in general. Yet in spite of this, there are still certain types of films I just can't get enough of. For example, I absolutely love...

- Every film in which Burt Reynolds drives a Trans-Am and is pursued by the cops (special bonus points if the cops happen to be Jackie Gleason or Charles Nelson Reilly in a chicken suit).

- Comedies where a black guy in a head band makes a series of comical noises.

- Dramas in which the mentally retarded witness a murder and must track down the killer.

- Anything starring Don Knotts

- Any film where Mickey Roarke challenges a mail box to a fight.

- Socially relevant potboilers where a racist sheriff is taught the importance of tolerance by Johnny Appleseed.

- Horror movies where ghosts hang around a 7/11 parking lot and talk loudly about their Camaros

- Robert Altman's Nashville.

- Documentaries that tackle heartache, sex, insecurities, gender politics and the Hamburglar.

- Politically charged dramas that feature at least one scene where Kim Jong Il eats too much honey and gets stuck in a rabbit hole.

- Whimsical films where Cockney rogues travel by flying car and sad meth addicts accidently set their beds on fire.

- Any film where a climactic chainsaw duel takes place between Hugh Downs and Deputy Dog.